Film Club

It’s a crisp and foggy night, all you wanna do is stop by the movie store, recoup under the florescent lights and catch the next muni home to watch some weird ass flick the alt girl at the check out counter recommends.

Hi, it’s me, the weird ass alt girl at the check out counter- I see you’re returning Sixteen. I don’t know you very well, but maybe this would be a sick follow-up.

Crazy/ Beautiful (2001)

Well, here I am crying my eyes out after researching photos for this entry. This has been one of my favorite films since it came out, I was about 15 so it resonated with me as Kirstin being the ‘it’ girl. Retrospectively, I wish I were there to hug her and keep her safe, but also like- It was so nice of her to do that for me.

Nicole, played by Kirsten Dunst, is an ‘wild’ partying teen in Los Angeles. When we first meet her, she’s wearing an orange vest as she picks up trash on the beach- court ordered. Now, I recently quit drinking after starting when I was too young. The part where I was “too young” to have a 40 oz of Mickey’s in my clutch, is where I start to glue myself to this character. Although here is where I start to detach- She’s rich as fuck.

In present day irl family time- whenever we’re driving through the Hollywood Hills, talking about how weird places are without sidewalks, I’m looking for her bland mansion enclosed with almost all glass. PS also looking for Brittany Murphy’s old house but that’s the true crime weirdo in me. (*l8r editors note* upon more research I found out Nicole’s mansion is in Malibu and inaccessible)

That old saying, money doesn’t buy happiness. Her mother had committed suicide when she was a child and now as a teen she feels completely rejected by her absent father and his new girlfriend. As a lot of us do, she turned to drugs and alcohol.

Carlos, played by Jay Hernandez is a good kid- ahhh, such a sweet kid- go back while you still can!!! Carlos meets Nicole-alright here we go…

Girl, his mama was not having it! Let me tell you!!!!!! There was Nicole in her big ass house, driving around in her nice car, talking on her mobile Nokia phone and still fucking shit up.

And Carlos is sharing their humble home with his extensive family, taking the bus 4 hours to school to get into a good college to become a pilot, busy signal on the landline at all times, and still thriving.

But we can’t be too harsh on Nicole, you guys. I’m sure you’ll like her art. Using a 1970’s Polaroid and Film Camera Nicole photographs her world, an eye, a vision, a voice that perhaps doesn’t mean a thing to anyone in her life. There’s a lot of pain she doesn’t know what to do with but to be numbed.

She creates an amazing transfer with one of the polaroid photographs into her journal- that moment flashes in my head daily. I’ve failed at recreating it multiple times.

This guy, I swear, you gotta love him for trying. I’m not gonna give it all away for you.

You get all those TRUE y2k vibes, long scarves with tank tops anyone? I was a knitter so you know I had 3. I love the old rule “show us don’t tell us” This was a story where my eyes got to dive into a different life as a fly on the wall, a truly fun experience.

Carlos’ house reminds me a lot of my good friend Rocio’s house. Growing up my house was always the empty, cluttered, and lots of soda house and her’s was the energetic, colorful (her dad painted the house every season) cultural, beautiful home I was welcomed into. *I love you Rocio*

I know I’m recommending this film more on a ‘this is how I relate to this film” basis but I wanted to highlight, step up to the plate and represent as a fellow fuck-up, always working on reforming for the better good of the beautiful people around me and myself <3 I’m sure someone can relate.

Fun Facts

Filming Locations:

• Los Angeles

• Twentynine Palms

• Santa Monica Pier

• 1016 White Knoll Dr, Los Angeles, CA (Carlos’s house is sadly a condo now)

• Nicole’s mansion in Malibu remains intact and secured behind a long driveway and spikey gates